The birth of Lucas Byron Tueller
The biggest thing I was banking on for this birth taking place was for Shmike to get home…then and only then could I go into labor! He wasn’t there for Murphy’s birth, so we HAD to get him home for this one! The catch is he only had two weeks home from his deployment, so we had to strategize the best day…juuuust in case I went into labor early (I was a week early with Murphy, but I naturally induced, so not sure to what extent my body really goes into labor early), but also if I went past my due date. So being due the 28th, we decided on the 23rd. His flight came in at 8pm, and wow was I nervous to pick him up! We hadn’t seen each other since May!!! AHHH! What if we had secretly changed?? So many anxious thoughts. I was easily sweating profusely while waiting down at baggage claim with my little ‘Welcome Home’ sign…with so much angst I had to quietly sing ‘Silent Night’ under my breath…<only a few awkward side-glances from those around me, but hey-it helped.
Once Shmike and I exchanged first glances coming down the escalator, it was pure excitement from there. Other than his voice sounding different (than FaceTime), that really was the only weird thing. It took about an hour of re-absorbing each other, and then we were back :).
Just before noon the next day, Christmas Eve, I started to feel crampy…a classic uncomfortable period. Gratefully I made it through the play The Nutcracker just fine, and while at Olive Garden I only cumbersomely shifted around a few times – like a respectably powerful menstruation.
We got to my parent’s house just before 5pm, and I lightheartedly tell my mom what I am feeling. During all if this, I am beyond positive that I will probably feel this for at least a full day or two, because things took so long to progress with #murphymancub. So I tried to grin and bear it, refusing to take any of these hearty sensations seriously. Talk about the perfect night for distractions! One moment I would be about to grit my teeth through the contraction, and then suddenly I would be laughing through the Christmas Eve traditions. One great distraction was ‘the candy bar game’…a lot of thinking, remembering, and competitive fire…as silly as the fight for a snickers is, we will fight to the death for it! We played another fun game, this one even more intense and distracting — my mom had wrapped lots of little toys/trinkets/money/gift cards into a huge seran-wrap ball, and we got to go around and try to unwrap as much as we could before the number on the dice was rolled. I ended up with a dollar, a five dollar bill, an IHOP gift card, and a sucker-plunger that dips into a candy toilet haha. I obviously scored big time. After our nativity act, pajama party, and settling into bed, I finally realized that I wasn’t going to be able to sleep. By now it was about 10:00pm. I then tried mainly focusing on connecting to my baby-imagining going up into the birth canal with him – calming, beckoning and reassuring him to come out. After an hour of eyes closed, feeling and focusing on these sensations, I was going a little crazy. Far from sleep, I needed to get up. Still in denial though, I figured if I can take a hot shower and drink some chamomile tea I would be able to relax enough to sleep. Well I definitely did not go to bed after that. Once I was up, moving around and really focusing my attention on what my body was going through, I really started to progress! In and out of the shower a few times, drinking lots of chamomile tea (turns out it’s a wonderful thing for labor!) as well as coconut water (natural electrolyte) until about 2ish. I think I took another dose of my daily herbs/vitamins– adding in a few extra capsules of ‘Birth Prep’. I had a pretty strong prompting in the shower to tell my midwife where I was at in my labor…though still thinking I had plenty of time. A little tricky timing them myself, I figured contractions were about 4-5 minutes apart and very consistent. Well about a half hour later things were progressing even more and I couldn’t labor on my own any longer. So I woke my husband with an “I NEED YOU” (Shmike had been getting less than 5 hours of sleep from traveling and Jet Lag, so I really wanted him to sleep as long as possible) and then called my mom (who was just upstairs). Thankfully they were immediately on it, starting to fill the birthing tub and other such preparations.
It was then that I needed Shmike to really focus entirely on me once the contractions started, and put some SERIOUS counter pressure on my hips…which he was so amazing at. All the while he was such a, calm presence, giving me reassuring and motivating words.
Once my midwife got there (about 3:30am) she relayed how the blizzard made her only able to drive 40mph on the freeway (on a good day is about a 30 minute drive, but this took a lot longer), and even then her car spun a 360! Talk about a dedicated midwife! Thanks Karla!!
By then contractions were less than two minutes apart, and I was completely relying on my dear husband to save me. And he really did. I let him be in charge of helping my physical pressure, and that let me focus entirely on my breath. He was what I needed to really get into the zone.
When contractions got to be one minute apart is when I had to let my body, breath and voice take over….just keep breathing down and deep. I was surprisingly really quiet-a few grunts and one siren-type wimper, but Murphy and everyone in the guest bedrooms around us didn’t wake up until Lucas was actually born and started crying!
My midwife is a fan of laying on the side once the body is ready to push, as to avoid tearing. We worked really hard to go slow and not tear, but unfortunately we still got a good tearing…probably due to the scar tissue from Murphy’s delivery. I seriously could not believe it was already time to start pushing when my midwife felt the baby’s head! In the moment I felt like I was pushing forever (always does, right??), but it really was only for just over a half hour. Shmike was able to catch the baby, and it wasn’t until he was resting on me that we actually checked the gender. A BOY! We knew it!!
Ever since he came out he has been a champ- nursed easily, sleeps great, and is such a loving powerful spirit. I mean hey, he came on Christmas!! That has got to say something, right??
We are so blessed to have Lucas-love in our family! I can’t wait to see your personality emerge! There were multiple time during pregnancy when I was meditating and felt so connected to you. I felt your strength and your boundless love–your selflessness and your determination. You love your family and are beyond willing to do anything for them. I even caught a glimpse of you when you are older, and I sensed your mission in this life is very impactful. I am so lucky to be your mom!
Birthing our second child:
? | L A B O R & D E L I V E R Y | AFFIRMATIONS | ?
Contractions are W A V E S of pressure—surf the waves!
This is the way God intended women to have babies.
Women have dominion over the first veil, bringing spirits from Heaven to Earth. Our spirits were trained how to give birth-we just need to open up that space of trust.
Sacrifice is taking yourself out of the equation.
This birth is about my baby, and I GET to be the vessel – letting my love safely guide this sweet spirit into arms of comfort.
I PRAY THAT I MAY REMEMBER I AM A CO-CREATOR WITH GOD, THAT I MAY RISE UP IN THE SACRED PLACE OF LOVE – WHERE GOD IS. NOT IN A PLACE OF FEAR, FOR FEAR IS NOT OF GOD. LET ME BE IN FAITH AND PEACE.
“Devil, I refuse to be hurt and afraid!”
“You are not subject to your body. Using the name of Jesus, command your body to do what it needs to do. To push, to stop bleeding, to contract, etc.” –‘Supernatural Childbirth’
“Make your confession of The Word outloud, to yourself, to your husband, to God.” –‘Supernatural Childbirth’
Faith is having confidence, being totally at peace – confident that it is all working. “And this is the confidence that we have in him, that, if we ask any thing according to his will, he heareth us” (1 John 5:14)
“Why would a woman who is expecting be afraid?? Who does this fear come from?” –‘Supernatural Childbirth’
We know what to do with fear. Say out loud, “I rebuke you fear in the name of Jesus. God has not given me a spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. I have God’s perfect love and that perfect love casts out fear.” (2 Tim 1:7; 1 John 4:18)
There comes a time when you have to stand on the Word of God and say, “No, I reject the defeat and the disappointments of the past. I’m not receiving that anymore. I’m going to stand on god’s Word and have God’s best.”
GOD HAS INTENDED FOR BIRTH TO BE SUPERNATURAL
“Be encouraged; stay with it. God will meet you where you are and bring you where you need to be.” –‘Supernatural Childbirth’
“People often fight for the right to suffer. You can live in pain, and God will love you. But God says there is a better way. Jesus has paid for salvation, healing, prosperity, deliverance and blessing. He wants you to walk in health and prosperity and all the blessings that He has given you through Jesus. He’ll do anything to meet you where you are if you put your confidence in Him and His Word.” –‘Supernatural Childbirth’
“Because we have set our love upon Him; therefore, will He deliver us. He will set us on high, because we have known His name. We shall call upon Him, and He will answer us. He will be with us in trouble; He will deliver us and honor us. With long life will He satisfy us and show us His salvation. Salvation is of the Lord. In Jesus’ name.” (Ps. 91:1-16; Ps. 20:7)
_________Beautiful, Bountiful, Blissful Kundalini Book_______________
Pregnancy boot camp prepares you for surrender (love).
If you go through labor and you have no idea of the vastness of your spirit, you could be araid. You have to have an experience of your vastness before you have to call upon it.
YOU ARE THE STRONGEST YOU HAVE EVER BEEN. You are the most intuitive, you are the most flexible.
Something so RIGHT is taking place!!
Rather than think about ways to distract yourself from pain, dive right into the middle of the sensation and welcome it, because with every contraction you are that much closer to holding your baby in your arms. Go deep within yourself and find that meditative mind; what you will find is a way to feel each descrete moment. In one instant there will be pain, and in another there will be sensation—a big difference.
A favorite saying I like to use is, “Strong mama breath. Breathe in for baby.” Or with each contraction, visualize your cervix as a flower that is opening, as you chant, “Open, open, open.”
‘Thank you body, thank you baby. I love you body, I love you baby.’
Birth and Labor SUPPLEMENTS and FOOD
Essential Oils – Geranium. Lavender. Frankincense. Peppermint. Clary sage. Peace/Calming blend. Deep relief/Deep Blue. Lemon. Cypress. Bergamot. Spikenard. Thieves.
Perineum-2 weeks before: geranium and lavender.
Perineum During labor: frankincense (and sage if needing to progress). F helps during crowning too.
Soreness after: Geranium!!
Claraderm spray: coconut oil, myrrh, tea tree, lavender, frankincense, chamomile and helichrysum.
Strengthen contractions: clary sage: ankles, abdomen, internally.
Perineum and Uterine contraction discomfort: crockpot of ginger water with frankincense and lavender.
Transition: frankincense! On belly-either oil or washcloth.
Emotion stress: Bergamot on back if neck or temples.
Music – two playlists – upbeat and relaxing
Homeopathics – caullophyllum 200c or cimicifuga 200c for cervix dilation. Gelsemium 30c and Pulsatilla 30c to keep labor progressing. Pushing phase, Arnica 200c. Overall exhaustion, Kali Phos 200c.
“After Ease” tincture supplement.
Progesterone mixed with oil-pain reliever on belly and back.
“Sitz bath spray”
Magnesium oil spray
During Birth and Labor
•Hot and cold packs
Alternate nostril breathing
Bach flower remedies
Homeopathy: arnica, black and blue cohosh and chamomila
E Oils: Anxiety and fear: neroli, bergamot, rose abd frankincense
Lavender and Clary sage=labor blend
Stimulate and strengthen contractions-jasmine compress on lower abdomen or sacrum.
Relaxing and opens contractions-8 spikenard, 7 jasmine and 3 lemon verbena. Evening primrose oil on cervix if rigid and not dilating.
Being pregnant the second time, I feel fortunate enough to have the beneficial hindsight and experience from my first; where the flip side of the coin makes it impossible to disregard the tinge of suffering combined with the sting of true labor realization still lingering upon my awareness.
In recollection, even weeks after my birth I was not only unsure of ever wanting to have a natural childbirth again, but was also reconsidering going through another birth…ever. Some people have incredibly beautiful/tender/spiritual/enlightening experiences with their birth story—I have heard. For me, it was REALLY really hard…super long labor and delivery deep into the night, 3rd degree tearing with more than 50 stitches-adding an extra two hours of sewing after the birth, plus Murphy’s inconsolable crying for nearly a half hour-making nursing and the whole ‘bonding’ after effect of birth extremely exhausting and less than ideal.
I hope I don’t sound too downtrodden… honestly, for awhile right after the birth, I was really drained on the whole ‘birthing’ experience. Granted, I realized I was a total warrior goddess, with newfound power to take on absolutely anything!
Overall though, after some time had passed, I have been able to truly embrace and even cherish such a trying experience. It probably took a month…maybe two…but if you would have asked me after those immediate postpartum weeks, I would do it again. Promise.
So now that I AM doing it again, I say-bring it on!! Though of course I am clinging tightly to the hope that this experience will be a little faster, little more smooth than before. They say after the first your body knows what to do, right?? Oh deary I hope so!! Honestly though, I am super *nervously* excited…
With one labor and delivery under my belt, I have been wanting to prepare better than I did the first time. Looking back at my labor there are definitely some specifics that I’ll do whatever I can to relieve. For example, during transition it felt like my pelvic bones were being cracked/pried open by a giant like a pistachio…. Pelvic pistachio. So in order to escape the giant’s nut hankering this time around, I need to prep more with stretches, preggo squats, chiropractic adjustments, etc.
Things like that. Maaany more things…
Honestly I thought I was as ready as I could be when I went into labor with Murphy… guess it takes learning the hard way sometimes (welcome to my life haha) to realize you don’t have it figured out!
I have to admit though- my grand intentions for this pregnancy have been pretty measly…I haven’t been dedicated at even doing what I did with Murphy. Granted, having a toddler really changes your schedule and possibilities previous to having children! I really need to step up to what I could and should be doing. For example, if I get a green smoothie in and take 1 or 2 of the 3 [whole food] prenatal vitamins I should be taking, I pretty much call it good. BUT now that I just hit my third trimester, I am dedicated to upping my game to the best possible preparation for my ultra-marathon-to-come!
Two weeks ago I did my blood work, showing I am slightly anemic. Also have had a slight UTI/bladder infection (thus results my sub-par efforts), so– I am determined to knock the socks off my future results! Can you tell I grew up with all boys, and am only slightly >very< competitive??
*UPDATE: Infection is gone! Blood is roaring with iron and strength! (and energy levels are back to a thumbs up J)
Since entering this very sphere-shaped final trimester I have been pretty consistent in my regime, and overall I feel quite delightful. Occasionally I get some sciatic pain, but then I crank out my sciatic exercises, or add in an extra chiropractic visit, and that takes care of it.
The ultimate 3rd trimester routine:
–Chlorophyll (blood transfusion) – 1-3x daily
–Food based prenatal (Garden of Life, Megafood, Vitalherbs, NewChapter) 3x daily
–Probiotic (particularly with __________ strain and super great if you can get some soil based probiotics in there as well) 1-3x daily
–Omega 3 (I like taking both EPA/DHA (but not particularly fish oil-why kill so many fish when they get their Omegas from the algae they eat—go to the primary source-Algae: Ovega 3) and ALA from flax/chia seeds and flax/chia oil supplements)
–Wheat Germ Oil (Vit E + plus mulitple hormone precursors –particularly octicosonal)
1 liter daily:
-Red Raspberry Leaf
-Preggo Tea combo
–Greens in pill or powder form – 1x daily (easy to throw into a green smoothie)
–Blood builder (boosts and strengthens blood supply) (GofL, Megafood, Unsulphured Blackstrap Molasses [1-3 T daily], Floradix [so-so]) – 1x daily
–Liver herbs (Turmeric, Milk Thistle, Barberry, Dandelion) (Helps filter out toxins, take a stress load off the body, eases transition of fluctuating hormones) 1-3x daily
Say yes to –
-Naturally occurring sugar (fruit, honey, pure maple syrup <but don’t go crazy!)
-Nuts/Seeds (again, don’t go crazy…high fats can be hard on the liver)
-Whole grains (get a variety-with plenty of ancient grains)
-Cultured foods ie kombucha, kefir, sauerkraut, etc.
Stay away from –
-Mucus forming foods ie WHITES!: processed flour, processed sugar(!), milk, cheese and dairy
-Meat in high amounts (sparingly)
~Move your body!~
-Walk a mile a day (of course you can do more than this, if your body embraces it)
-Pregnancy squats (you can’t do these enough!! Ina May Gaskin says “Squat 300 times a day, you’re going to give birth quickly.”)
-Cat/Cow – at least three minutes
-Sciatica/lower back pain eradicator
-Yoga canada goose mÃ¤nner